You Can Change Bullying…Watch What Happens
Watch What Happens to This 5-Year Old When Two High School Football Players Take Notice.
Its inspiring and relieving when outside forces step in to lend a helping (and sometimes life-saving) hand when someone is being bullied. We all have a responsibility to treat one another with respect, kindness and to honor each other’s freedom. When these attributes aren’t fostered within a child’s home or their living environment, it can lead to bullying behaviors. Further, its extremely important for parents to authentically examine their own behaviors and discipline to ensure that they aren’t cultivating these unwanted behaviors (power struggles and/or feelings of powerlessness) within their children.
If children are frequently supplemented with parental domination, control and punishment this can teach your child that it’s ok to:
- dominate and disrespect another person or life form (i.e., animals, pets, nature)
- get what you want through control and pain tactics
- use fear to get your way
- it’s ok to be a bully
Interestingly, these parental behaviors can affect children in one of several ways. Either the child predominantly acts out as a bully, they learn to feel helpless and victimized by others or life, or worst of all they practice both. There are no upsides to using punishment for a child’s development – which can include emotional, psychological and physical (the physical body and the effects on the neuro-construction and development of the physical brain). In truth a bully really feels powerless on the inside and simply uses the misguided and ineffective tactics that he/she has been taught to reestablish a sense of control or (seeming) power over their life.
THE SIDE EFFECTS
Both victimization and bullying build unwanted neuro programming within the brain that interferes with your child’s upward development and ability to have a reflective and resilient brain – which ultimately effects emotions, sense of peace, well-being, joy, self esteem and worth. The ill-behaviors also impede the electrical flow and access to the higher thinking and reflective reasoning centers of the brain that are responsible for joy, creativity, love and gratitude. It’s no mistake that these children and teens aren’t feeling joy, love and happiness. We’re building their brain to develop the opposite!
Next time you’re tempted to punish your child just for the sake of getting your way or to establish an “I’m the boss” kind of thing – reflect heavily upon the statements in the above paragraph and ask yourself, “Is it worth it?” Domination is a vicious cycle that can be perpetuated generation after generation. Step out of any guilt for what you may have done in the past …and simply be the parent who changes it in your family’s future – forever!
The video is beautiful example of how two young men (who clearly have excellent access to their higher brain centers and human potential) stepped in and made a difference. Maybe one day everyone will be lucky enough to have an enlightened, kind and inspiring person to take notice. However, that may not always be the case so here are 3 powerful things you can use everyday to fortify your child from the inside out. Teach your children about their:
- Emotional Technologies. It is vital for every human being to correctly learn about their emotional technologies including how they work, what they tell you and how to use them. We are not our emotions, like many of us have been taught to believe! They are a guidance system that provides information directly from your Source or Higher Self, which knows and sees all dimensions and aspects about our you and your life. We are operating in the dark until we get a sufficient handle on how to do this. The lack of understanding on this subject is precisely why so many kids, teens and adults are emotionally struggling or only making nominal progress towards improvements. We spend so much time covering up our emotions instead of listening to the direction and feedback that they flawlessly provide. The MBSP Guidebook can help show you how!
- There is something inside each of us doing the thinking. This thing is not your brain…it is your mind. The mind is a virtual aspect of our human dimension. The mind and the thoughts (beneficial or otherwise) give direction to the brain for how it will be hard-wired according to the data and quality of thoughts that it receives. Teaching your child mindful awareness is essential for regulating and directing the mind. Mindful awareness is being aware of you own mind at any given moment in time, including observing what it is thinking and being able to purposefully quiet it and/or choose new thought patterns. The Internet is filled with mindful awareness and breathing activities that can assist you and your child. Having a reflective mind minimizes stress, opens the higher regulatory brain centers and it helps you feel higher emotions such as peace, contentment, confidence and joy. Indigo Ocean Dreams is a great audio storybook that has guided meditations for kids.
- Beliefs aren’t real. They are only thoughts that we think over and over until they become automatic stored patterns within the brain, which means you don’t have to think about them, they just happen (e.g., you don’t relearn how to talk and walk each day…it just happens). The good news is belief patterns can be changed in the brain and mind at any time! If your child is struggling use hopeful, authentic and inspiring words that opens their perspective about themselves or a situation. Never use I AM statements with any negative or unwanted words (i.e., I am fat, ugly, unhappy, unable to___, never going to be happy/healthy/wealthy, never going to get through this, etc.). The I AM statement is very effective at building neuro circuitry within the brain quickly (for better or worse). Use it with uplifting words such as I AM…. loved, important, worthy, talented, confident, a peaceful person, willing to let this go, willing to look at this another way, etc.
Learning to use these powerful technologies effectively will help you child triumph over any obstacle and challenge that life presents. When we build resilient, confident and loving children from the inside out…. victimization and bullying will fade from our human consciousness…. and from our physical experiences.